Jesus+Heaven {all with the innocence of a child}

If you follow me on Facebook, then it's likely you saw my post about Avery's classmate going to be with Jesus. The sweet little girl drowned in her bathtub a few weeks ago. I didn’t know how to handle the issue, so I left it alone until Avery asked. Sure as the world he asked where his friend was the next day. Being one of faith, Avery had heard the term Heaven before because we’ve gone to my grandparents graves and he’s asked where they were and so on. I told him Heaven was in the sky, far away. Anyway, for an instant, I didn’t know what I was going to tell him. I went with the truth and told him Heaven. He then asked, “Mama, she play in Heaven?” I told him, “yes, she plays in Heaven.”

He was OK with that answer, for a couple of days.Then he asked where his friends was again. I said Heaven and hoped that it would satisfy his curiosity for a little while this time too. Nope. He ask, “Can I go and play with Alexis in Heaven.” Oh Crap, what do I say? How do I explain this one? I tried to explain that he could way, way, way down the road, but Mama wanted him to stay here and play. In a 3 year olds mind, that was sufficient enough for that day.

Over this past weekend more questions rolled in. "Why is Alexis in Heaven?" "Where's her mama at?" "Where is Jesus?" "Why is Alexis with Jesus?" "Can I play with Alexis?" "Can mama take me to Heaven to see Alexis?" My mind was boggled. I honestly didn't know how to begin to answer these questions. So I just went one-by-one down the list and gave it my best shot. I addressed that Heaven was far away. Jesus lives everywhere, even inside our heart. I told him that Jesus wasn't ready for us to come play with him yet and he would let us know when it was our turn. Alexis' parents were at home because Jesus hadn't invited them over to play in Heaven yet. And the toughest question I answered was, "Why is Alexis with Jesus?" As tough as it was, I went with the honest answer. I told him she died. He understands that died means not able to move. Much to my surprise, he accepted that answer as well as all the others. He repeated everything back to me, which he does a lot anyway. He likes for me to know he understands or visa-versea. 

He kept telling me Jesus was in his heart as he rubbed his chest. He even told Jesus "hello" while rubbing over his little heart. I'm sure there will be more questions and I'm sure I will panic as I try to figure out a truthful answer that is appropriate for a 3 year old, but I feel fortunate enough that my child cares about others. I'm happy that he feels confident in me to provide these answers to him, even if he's only 3. I pray that he always has this trust in me and that he will always ask me questions, even if the answers are hard for his mama to explain.


I remember {21 years ago today}

My sister, Callie, and I are 4 1/2 years apart. We haven't always been the closest of sisters, which I blame mostly on the age difference, but we've always been there for each other nonetheless. Today is Callie's 21st birthday, a big milestone in one's life. It's hard to believe that it's been 21 years since I first saw her. 

I remember the day distinctly by vivid pictures in my head.  I had on a burgundy corduroy jumpsuit with a turquoise turtle neck on, stylish, I know. I remember waiting in the waiting room for her to arrive with my Nanny and Pop. I remember laying my head on my Nanny's lap hoping I could see her soon. I remember walking into the hospital room to see her. I don't remember who was holding her, but I assume it was my mom. The first vivid picture I have of her was when my Nanny was holding her in the chair beside my mom's hospital bed, and I remember just starring in amazement. I remember the nurse coming in to put the stuff on her eyes, you know, that goopy looking stuff they put on all newborns eyes. I remember my parents having the carpet removed from our house during this time and my dad and I coming home from the hospital to new hardwood floors. I remember putting on our socks and sliding around on the new floors. We slid all over the house until my dad got a splinter. It was a special time for my dad and me. He being a new dad again and me being a big sister, we had to celebrate accordingly.  I remember my daddy taking me to daycare the next day for me to tell all my friends about my little sister. I was such a proud big sister.

Now, 21 years later, my sister and I have been through so much together. No matter what, she's always been there to support me. She's a great sister, aunt, and most importantly, my best friend. 
I love you so much, Callie. I know 2012 is a huge year for you and I'm so excited for you. May God always bless you and may you always know I'm here for you.

Happy Birthday, Sis!


some good ol' Christmas times {and new years}

We had a wonderful Christmas. We, as in Chris, Avery, and I, spent Christmas Eve night with my parents and sister. Mom cooked her yummy lasagna and layered salad! Delish! We watched Christmas Vacation, laughed at cousin Eddie, and enjoyed the fellowship. Santa came down the chimney and left Avery tons of goodies in which he was overjoyed to discover Christmas morning. Mom and Dad made our traditional Christmas breakfast and we all stuffed our faces once again. After breakfast, we opened gifts and oooed and ahhhed over the lovely gifts that we had gotten. Chris had to go get Trevor, so we wrapped up the party at my parents house and headed out. Christmas night we spent at Chris's parents house. We watched in delight as the children opened gifts and the excitement on their faces warmed our hearts. We once again ate more yummy food and enjoyed visiting everyone. Monday morning we drove to meet Avery's dad and dropped off my little buddy.

New Years was laid back. Chris, Trevor, and I relaxed at home, made some yummy appetizers to munch on, and brought in the new year with a toast, a kiss, and some confetti. I am so glad to begin this new year and look forward to what it has to offer.