oh how the years go by {avery turns 6}

Dear Avery,

When I think about you turning 6, my heart aches a little.  It's not that I'm not enjoying you at this stage in your life, because you always bring joy to my life, but my heart aches because these years are going by so fast!  I cannot begin to describe these past 6 years and how much I have enjoyed being your mommy.   You, my dear baby, are amazing! Your zest for life is beyond my soul’s comprehension. I am in awe of every accomplishment you have made, every new thing you've learned, and your powerful and gentle spirit.  I often times call you "grandpa" because you always think things through, ask numerous questions (more like 100's of questions), and you always take your time.

Son, you are wise beyond your years.  You have a heart of gold and are one of the most passionate people I know.  You pray for those around you, you worry about those who are ill or hurt, and you always want to make sure everyone is okay.  Your little brain is like a sponge--you love to learn new things and you soak up life to the fullest.  So far, you enjoy school and are eager to learn.  I hope this doesn't change.  You are a brilliant little boy.

As of today, you say you want to be a Coca-Cola truck driver.  You love the Coca-Cola trucks and are always excited to go see them at Chris' work.  I'm sure that whatever you decide to do in life, you will give it your best!  You've always had a tremendous work ethic and for that I am grateful.

I want you to know that mommy is always here for you and will always, always, always love you no matter what!  You make my days brighter and you fill my heart with so much love.  I hope you have an amazing 6th birthday and remember mommy loves you more than there are stars in the sky!

I love you, Avery!

Love,
Mommy

happy birthday, nanny

Today, my sweet Nanny (Mom's Mom) would have turned 80.  

 I miss her so much.  I miss how she mispronounced words like "Taco" by saying "Tarco" or by saying "Wal-Marts" instead of "Wal-Mart."  

I miss her home cooking that scented the house and filled you so full you couldn't move.

 I miss making homemade biscuits with her and eating all the dough.  

I miss our "boogy" (dance) sessions in the kitchen.  

I miss holding her soft hands and the scent of her night cream on her face.

I miss watching our "stories" together.  

I miss her hugs and I miss her kisses.  

And today, I'm missing celebrating her special day with her!  

Happy Birthday, Nanny.  

I love and miss you more than yesterday, but not as much as tomorrow.  

Until I see you again...

hush that fuss

Since my family and I started going to church on a regular basis, I feel that God is working in our (mine and my husband’s) lives tremendously. I feel so close to my husband at church. God’s amazing love is so powerful and strong, it’s truly indescribable. I know one of the things I pray most about is for God’s strength to work through me to raise God-fearing children. I want my family to thirst for the love of God and beg for his mercies.

With all of that said, I fall short on a daily basis. I'm guilty of "losing my cool" with my kids at times. What mother hasn't? That guilty and nauseating feeling when you know you just yelled at your own flesh and blood because you are tired, because they spilt milk on the floor, or even dripped pee on the toilet is sometimes too much to bear. This subject has weighed heavy on my heart as I have found myself more and more stressed out trying to work full-time, have a side business, and go to school. Who wouldn’t be in the nut house already? The point is my number one job is to be a Godly wife and mother to my family. I want my house to beam with the glory of God and I want my children to feel safe and secure at all times. I want to not only teach my children how to love in a Godly way, but I want them to see it daily through the love my husband and I give to them.

Today, I want to take the pledge to not yell. I want to take the leap of faith that God will provide me the wisdom, strength, and patience to always see my kids as just that, kids. No more crying over spilled milk, literally. This is not to say that I’m throwing discipline out the front door, because children need boundaries and they must learn to follow rules, but I want to discipline my children in a way that will teach them in a productive way and I want my children to know forgiveness, because God knows I’ve had to ask for it daily. Between proper discipline (instead of yelling) and the understanding of forgiveness, my prayer is for my children to want to work harder to be Christ-like.

I once saw a quote that said, “Families that pray together, stays together.”

Lord I pray, oh how I pray, that my sweet family always turns to you, our Lord and Savior, for guidance and also to learn to lean on each other for love, guidance, and wisdom. I pray that your merciful hands cover my family always and that we open our eyes to you always and forever. In your name, amen!


If you struggle with the stress of being a mom, on top of all the stress of "life" in general, take a moment to read these post:

http://theorangerhino.com/10-things-i-learned-when-i-stopped-yelling-at-my-kids/

http://theorangerhino.com/12-steps-to-stop-yelling-at-your-kid/

http://www.handsfreemama.com/2013/05/22/the-important-thing-about-yelling/

mother's day {2013}

I had a spectacular Mother’s Day yesterday.  I was completely spoiled by Avery and Chris (Trevor was with his mother).

I woke up to Avery bringing me a card in bed, and then he told me to come quick, there was a “noder surprise."  I walked into the living room and found a Kitchen Aid mixer sitting on my ottoman.

Happy squeals, including the happy dance and clap too.  My husband knows the way to my heart.  I definitely love my nifty gadgets.  I purposely don’t watch the QVC channel as I would be broke as a joke from all the must-haves.

The hubs made me breakfast and we all got ready for church.  Afterward, my family came over to grill out and enjoy the gorgeous day we had.

Today, I want to share a few thoughts that came to me yesterday during church.  I really enjoyed the sermon and as I sat in church, my mind kept thinking of Mary, the mother of Jesus.   I thought about her anxiously awaiting the birth of her son.  These thoughts took me to the days leading up to Avery’s birth.  I remember the nervousness and excitement all rolled into one giant feeling.  I remember wondering about this thing folks called “motherhood.”  I also remember the days after Avery was born.   There was (and still is) more love than I ever thought my heart could have for his sweet soul. A few years later, I met Trevor (my husband’s son).  I knew the love for my own son, but I fell in love with sweet Trevor.   I didn’t carry him for 9 months, and I haven’t known him from his first breath, but I will love and care for this sweet boy until my dying breath.

God’s love has supplied me with the gift of these precious angels.  As our pastor preached yesterday, it’s our job as parents to guide these young souls to the Lord.   It’s my job to train my kids to love, honor, and obey our Father.  This all really hit home yesterday.   Motherhood isn’t easy by any means and so many days I fall short.  Some days I want to pull my hair out, and some days I wonder if I’m going crazy, but nothing, absolutely nothing, compares to the love I have for my children.  I think about God’s love for us, his children, and although it is much more powerful than any of us could ever imagine, it is so much like the love a mother has for her children.  God’s love makes me want to strive harder to teach my children about love and compassion, but also forgiveness and humility.  Life stinks sometimes, but I want my children to fully understand the power of prayer and the love of God. I want my children to know I will always love them and I will always forgive him, just like Jesus! 

As I said above, this all hit home yesterday, and it didn’t stop at church.   Avery and I were outside playing last night.   The night before Avery had discovered that our bird house had a nest in it. I checked it out and didn’t see eggs or baby birds it. Last night, we kept noticing a bird flying in and out, so Avery checked it again.  I got a flashlight to take a closer look and noticed a nest full of baby birds.   Oh, how precious they were.   (Avery and I were very careful not to touch the bird house.) The babies began the chirp the most gorgeous sounds.  And my mind, again, went back to a mother’s love.   I could only imagine the work this mother bird had put into her nest and eggs, to now be rewarded with these beautiful babies that she now cares for.   As I listened to the chirps of new life inside this bird house, I once again felt God’s love and beauty!   What a mighty God we serve!

I hope you all had a wonderful weekend as well! 

my valentine

Happy Valentine's day to my true love, Chris.

 There is not a moment that goes by that I do not thank God for joining our souls together; as I could not ask for a better soul mate than my Chris.

It is him (and our children) that makes me want to be a better person.

Since joining our lives together (nearly two years ago), I smile a lot bigger, laugh a lot louder, and love a lot more.

Chris' humor brightens my days, his tender heart gives me warmth, his voice gives me hope, and his arms give me security.

I love you honey, always and forever!

just 3 days {till w-day}

As September 15, 2012 quickly approaches, the jitters have been setting in. The nerves weren't from the thought of standing in front of 100+ people saying my vows or wondering if everything would turn out just the way I have planned. They came from the fear of the unknown. I know without a shadow of a doubt that Chris loves me to pieces. I know without any reservation that I love him more than words can explain. However, I don't know the future, but I kept wondering if I would always be the same person he loved today in 5, 10, 15, 20+ years?

Today, I kept digging deep into my heart to find an answer. I needed clarity that I could and would always be the person he fell in love with. Although I thought of every way possible to stay the same, I realized it was inevitable that I would be a different person in 5, 10, 15, 20+ years from now.  My conclusion was based on the fact that everyday I'm with Chris I strive to be better than I was today. He makes me want to be the best I can be.

When Chris and I found each other, I was broken. I had given up on love and I had given up on the idea of being in love. I was scarred and wounded, but he loved me anyways, shattered pieces and all. Little by little he helped me put the fragments of my heart back together again. He gave me hope, he gave me life, and most importantly, he gave me love. I can honestly say that I never knew what love was and what it could be until I met Chris. With every fiber of my being, I am grateful for the love Chris gives me daily.

In three short days, I will marry this sweet man and start a marriage I am hopeful for. I know God's hand was in this. I know all the heartache in my past played an important role in helping me realize what true love was and is. My heart is bursting with joy, my soul is hydrated, and I am ready to commit my life to this amazing man.

i wanna shout it to the world that...

Dreams really do come true. Fairy tales become reality. Love is real. I know this because I'm living proof!