Why Do I Blog?

Blogging. So many ask me what a “blog” is, others ask me why I blog. I thought I would enlighten all of you curious readers out there on what it is for me.

A blog is an online journal. You can post specific things, or like me you can post randomly what’s on your mind.

Blogging allows me to be free with my expressions. I am not shy when it comes to emotion and I do not mind being intensely forward in my entries. I always lived by the motto, “if you got something to say, say it.” I like blogging better than writing in a journal because I like feedback. Sometimes it’s good to hear how others view what you have to say. I take a lot of from what my blog readers say and I value their opinions whether I agree with them or not.
As emotional of a person that I am, I hold a lot in too. Blogging has allowed me to express what I hold in. It has given me a chance to break the silence of the stuff I hold in, to which I can say what I have to say and get it out. My depression has gotten better since I began blogging and the support of my readers really has helped me so much. I also like the fact that I have a way to keep up with our life. I love to go back and read what I wrote this time last year, to see what Avery was doing. It’s an amazing way to keep up with life. It’s just simply wonderful.

So why don’t you join in on the experience?

A Good Home for a Good Liver

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I have been hesitating writing this post for some time now, for several reasons. Part of me did not want to make it a reality and part of it was my dad was not ready to announce this to the whole world. However, I have realized that you, my prayer warriors, needed to know what all was going on.

So here it is.

My dad needs a liver transplant.

He has battled Hepatitis C for the last 30 years or so, only being aware of it the last 10 years. It’s contraction is not totally known, but we speculate he got the disease when he worked at a hospital back in the 70’s.

My dad is currently doing as well as can be expected. If you look at him, he doesn’t look “sick”. However, he’s very tired, jaundice, nauseous a lot, and suffers from other various bouts of sickness. His entire life has changed in an instant. Not only is he waiting on a liver to save his life, he has had to change his entire lifestyle to prepare for a liver. He has to lose weight, watch his sodium, sugar, and fluid intakes. No more alcohol or red meat and many other food restrictions. It’s been a whirlwind at our house trying to all get accustomed to this new lifestyle.

As far as the liver transplant goes, they are based on a Model for End-Stage Liver Disease, or MELD score. The scoring is as follows:

40 or more — 100% mortality
30–39 — 83% mortality
20–29 — 76% mortality
10–19 — 27% mortality
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Wordless Wednesday

Fun Times With Paw-Paw!

Quick Update

Not much to report on the home front. Avery is doing well. He's still got the yucky, runny nose, but the doctor gave him some medication today that will hopefully clear it up better than the last prescription.

He has been extra cuddly lately and I am soaking it all up. I love those extra special times when he just wants to be held by his Mommy. Ahh-Love it!

He found a new talent today, putting together puzzles. It didn't take him just a few minutes to figure out that you have to match items on a puzzle. Every time he got one right he would clap and cheer himself on. So.Stinking.Cute!

Hope you all are well. I have some cute pictures that need to be posted. Maybe tomorrow night. We'll see.

In My Heart

Today I am skipping Not Me Monday! because I have something weighing on my heart.

I have mentioned guilt before in a previous post, but today I want to touch on this subject again.


Am I the only one who feels guilty for things that are completely out of my control? It’s strange to carry such a burden in my heart on something I didn’t do wrong, but feel so guilty about. My guilt is over the issue of a mother losing a child. I have read so many stories over the last few years of family’s losing their babies to terrible disease, miscarriages, infertility issues, and the list goes on and on.


I don’t know God’s complete plan of why I got pregnant. I don’t know why I was chosen out of all the mothers in the world to carry my precious Avery and have an uneventful pregnancy. But I was. I was given this path by God and I feel guilty.


I feel guilty because when I found out I was pregnant, I was disappointed. I wasn’t married, I wasn’t in love with the father, and in no way, shape, or form was I prepared for this new journey. I admit I often prayed God would “take care” of it, so I wouldn’t be faced with this.


Now, I wish I hadn’t thought those thoughts. How selfish of me to be so disappointed in such a miracle. How selfish of me to not be overjoyed by such a gift. A gift so many would give everything to have. A gift so many will never experience.


I look at my precious Avery now and I thank God every.single.day for this miracle. I try my hardest to not take one day for granted with Avery. He’s not my child, he’s God’s child and God makes no mistakes.


Although I try, I still feel guilty for my thoughts when I found out I was pregnant. I don’t know if they will ever go away, but I ask for forgiveness for them. I ask God to bless every mother and all those women who so desperately want to be mothers.

Overload

Does your child's toy box look like this...


And does your child have to do this to get it to close...


And does it still not close all the way when your child does this...



I think it's safe to say that we are overloaded with toys and need to do some major cleaning out!

In Just a Few Hours

In a few hours, about 9 and 1/2 to be exact, we will be graced with the presence of 2010! Now I don't know about you all, but I for one am counting the minutes until the clock strikes midnight!

I'm not saying that 2009 didn't have any happy moments in it. I did meet my wonderful fiance this year. But, 2009 brought many hard times, I lost my Pop and Nanny.


2010 is surely to bring us many wonderful time.


Happy New Year Everyone!!!!